The Dentist...

What!!?? Darth Vader can't enjoy Dirt Rag
while dropping the kids off at the pool ?

1982.
I am 10 years old. I go to the dentist for my regular six month cleaning. The hygienist is killing me. She is stabbing me with that pick tool, just scraping across my teeth and my gums. I can clearly remember the iron taste of blood in my mouth. So I did what any scared and hurt 10 year kid would do. I bit the shit out of her. I bit the shit out of her, pulled out the spit sucker that was in my mouth, jumped out of the chair, ran through the waiting room, past my mother, out the door and to my mother's car. In the meantime, a car slammed on it's breaks, screamed to a halt, and I was inches from being a bug dink on their hood.
My mom was really pissed. I got grounded from my bike until I could go back to the dentist. It was a long six weeks. I clearly remembering how much I was dreading going back, but in the interest of getting my beloved bike back. I had to do, what I had to do. I went back.

2004.
I am 32 years old. I hate the dentist. I go for my normal six month cleaning. I sit and the chair and the hygienist begins to make small talk. I hate that. Just do your evil and be done with it. However, she sparks my curiosity when she says, "do you remember when you were younger, and you bit a hygienist and ran out the door?" Feeling pain from that experience all too familiar I speak up, "yeah, that bitch was mean, she was killing me." The room gets really quite. I think for a second that perhaps using the term "bitch" has offended the hygienist. she replies, "yeah, that was me. please sit back and open wide..." I lay back and shut my eyes readying myself for the pain about to come. No further words are spoken...

2005.
I am 33 years old. After changing jobs and hurting my back I have been remiss in getting my teeth cleaned, so I was a few months late. I finally get an appointment. I get in, I sit down. All the while I do not know who my hygienist is. She finally comes in and greets me. Then much to my horror she asks, "Was it you or your brother that ran out of the office when they were a kid?" I freak out. I 'm about to take a beating again. Instead, I do what any 33 year old man would do, who has been scared, who knows he's about to take another beating... I lied. "No, I think that was my brother Craig, not me..." Have to say the hygienist was great that day, maybe my best dentist visit ever.

Riding has been tough going this week, although today I had some fun. This morning did some time over at white clay. Had my fastest run up the border trail all year that was pretty cool, but felt like ass the last 15 minutes of the ride. I struggled to get my fatmarc ass back to the toaster.
After work tonight hooked up with Fuzzy at Fairhill for a good ride. We were supposed to meet Todd, Roadie Mike and Alan the cleaner, but it we never found them. I'll tell you the heat is just killing me and has made this week a bear. My legs feel so heavy, just beat down tired. I'm gonna chill tomorrow and try to get some life back into them for Saturday's Epic ride #2. Joey T is back in D-town looking a playboy with Danielson, while here the real world we should have a killer group this weekend : Wes the conqueror is coming down, Internet Friend Chris is coming too, Buddy, Matt, Amazin' Andrew, Slick Rick and Biddle, the ty domi of cross, are all scheduled to make an appearance. This is gonna be a fun ride. I hope it doesn't rain, I'm really stoked for the weekend. Looking for a ride? Drop me a line...

respect
fatmarc