leadership lesson you won't find in a text book

Dear Readers,

Near 20 years ago I got my first promotion to a  management position. I was the youngest supervisor on the floor of the bank credit card center. I had a lot of energy, and while I had not managed people before, I had been a coach and somewhat of a natural motivator. Initially,  I had 20 employees reporting to me and after a short period my call center team quickly rose through the ranks in pretty much every statistic that was measured.

I was young. I had fun. I made jokes and I think I inspired my team. My team, and the bulk of the call center was young, so having a common nomenclature was big advantage for me. While many of the other supervisors used carrot and the stick tactics, I treated everyone as an individual and challenged them to be their best.

I was young and a new supervisor. My desk, and my team's work area were strategically placed near the manager and vice president's office. While no one ever told me, I kinda suspected that I was there so they could keep an eye on me. That was cool with me.

One Monday morning, one of the reps that reported to me, came into the office super excited. Her name was Rita. Rita came straight over to my desk beaming.

"how was your weekend?" I asked her.

Rita replied, "it was amazing, I had such a great time. I got my first tattoo, I LOVE IT!"

"Congratulations! " I replied to her.

Before I knew what happened Rita followed up asking, "would you like to see it?"

With out thinking I answered, " Sure I would love to see it!"

Rita standing between me and the Vice President's office, turned around bent over and pulled down her skirt. Rita revealed her new tribal tattoo on the very low back. The tattoo was well done, but she also showed just a bit more of Rita than I wanted to or expected to see. I felt my face turning red with embarrassment I realized how badly I had blown this exchange.

I looked up and saw the Vice Present looking out the office at me, and Rita essentially mooning me on the floor. His eyes as big as saucers.

Rita turned back around still really excited and asked, "what do you think?"

Still somewhat shocked, embarrassed and frankly not sure what to say, "ah, it looks great! congrats"

I pretty much figured that I was about to be fired. I sat at my desk and just sweated it out.

Two hours later I got a call from the Vice President. "Marc, can you come down to my office?"

I walked down to his office and walked in. I was pretty damn sure I was about to have my last day.

"I understand that one of your employees wanted to share her new tattoo with you?" he asked.

"yes, sir" I responded. I looked down at the floor and braced myself for what was about to happen next.

"Son, in the future if someone asks you if you want to see their new tattoo, you respond by asking,"where did you get it ?"  He said to me.

"Do I make myself clear? " he asked firmly.

"yes sir, I absolutely." I said looking up, and for the first time thinking I wouldn't need to apply for unemployment.

"get back out of the floor with your team..." the vice president said.

"yes, sir!" I said and I scampered out of his office...

thanks for reading.

respect
Vanderbacon

I rode my bike today...

Dear Readers,

I rode my bike today. First time in over 6 weeks. I have been resting and stretching. I've felt steady improvement in my knee. Friends and professionals assure me to be  patient and time will heal this. Following those recommendations, today was my first ride.

In my mind for weeks, I imagined the first ride would be amazing, that somehow like Forrest Gump when I started to go the braces would come off and everything would click into place. It would be like some awesome training montage from the movies and I'd be propelled back to my former self.

But reality and my own life experience teaches me that the Russians aren't really cheering for Rocky, and no matter what pill Morpheus offers you there is nothing easy. The ride today was horrible. I spent entire 24 minutes terrified. I was scared my knee would be tight, that I'd feel something. That there'd be  some pain. I was hyper-sensitive. While I'm pretty sure there were no issues, I might have imagined a few... This was not the triumphant return I had imagined.

The ride itself wasn't much to speak of- 4.3 miles of bike path in 24 minutes. My bike, which six wheels ago felt like it fit like a glove, felt awkward under me. The seat height, which has been the same since I got the bike 2 years ago, felt a hair high... And I, I was scared to do anything, to change anything for fear of setting off my knee... I wanted joy today, instead I was just scared.

it will come. it will come...

I've got three more weeks of bike path. That I can handle. The fear, the fear may cause me to come undone like weezer's sweater...

thanks for reading

respect
m

Pes Anserine Tendinitis

Dear Readers.

After an amazing cross season, but one where ultimately I felt like my fitness level was below where I wanted it, I set out to make the 2015-2016 cross season my best. Armed with a new power tap, and lots of motivation I set out to have my best December and January on the bike ever...

The winter was tough with ice and rain, and like most riders I supplemented my outdoor riding time with time on the rollers. The challenge I found was to get the power numbers indoors that I was achieving outdoors. I was feeling good on the bike, maintaining race weight through the winter, and watching my power numbers improve each week.

I like when I can have full block on the strava. never expected that I'd 

accomplish this with empty blocks! 

In hindsight, with half my volume on the rollers for weeks, I should have known that it was really not sustainable mentally or physically.

I'm writing this not to elicit sympathy, but for a few reasons. One to serve as a reminder to myself that achieving balance is important. Secondly, to document for myself the process of injuring myself, and the path to recovery. Also, as I benefited from reading other athlete's experiences, perhaps someone can learn from my mistakes. (don't go swimming). Writing this is also part of how I process this stuff and for whatever reason it helps me to share... so here's the time line... I also know this in hindsight that while symptoms didn't start to show until January 19th, I was doing damage up to that point. None of my positions changed on my bike, the volume of hours was not higher than normal. The variable is the volume of rollers, and efforts on the rollers and not just using them for recovery or endurance riding. I believe that the torque on my knee to generate equal watts on the rollers that I was producing outdoors was a factor in my injury. Additionally, I often would force myself to stand on the rollers, (for variety and to keep my junk from falling asleep) but I really wasn't that good at it (standing on rollers). I believe this motion was also not the same as when standing and pedaling outside. I believe that all of this contributed to my overuse injury.

here's the timeline that I have kept:

Monday, January 19:
experienced a little odd pain in my right knee walking up and down stairs. I write it off to getting old. I do my recovery ride on the rollers with no issues.

Tuesday January 20:
walking around I feel tenderness on the inside of my knee. Stairs have a little pain... Diane and I try to ride trails but it's a shit show. I end up doing an urban ride. Put up some good times on some of my favorite winter training hills- I'm pretty happy with the ride.

Wednesday, January 21:
Rollers. I'm doing 2x20 and frankly looking for a new best 20 minute power effort. I fall just short of my best effort- achieved outdoors... At the end of the ride for the first time on the bike, I feel an odd twinge of pain on the inside of my knee. I am concerned.

Thursday, January 22:
no pain walking today. I ride fire roads with Sharon and Brian. It was fun. I rode my single speed fire road bike which I love, but also causes me to grind a bit more, and stand and climb most climbs. I rode this bike a lot this winter, it's really fun but I recognize grinding climbs out chasing Sharon and Brian, both riding really strongly,  didn't help my situation. No issues on the ride, mentally I begin to question if riding indoors was the issue.. In hindsight, mashing out tempo on fire roads on  a single speed couldn't have helped. (note, I didn't say gravel grinding)

Friday, January 23:
Rode before work. 30 minutes recovery on the rollers. No issues.

knowing bad weather is coming, I head out and do a quick loop at lunch outdoors. I pick up a few 2015 KOMS/PRs. I'm pretty happy. Feel fine on the bike... heck I'm kinda stoked...

Saturday, January 24:
Total shit show outside. I ride 2 hours on the rollers. I do intervals and try to keep my power levels similar to what I would do outside. No pain on the ride, but I feel something subtle climbing stairs the rest of the day.

Sunday, January 25:
My last training ride. The Mr. Belvedere Hates You loop. The groups was stacked, and frankly the guys I want to ride with, who I want to be my peers, but frankly have historically been stronger than me. It was a great ride, and I'm really happy with how I rode. I'm not sharp, but I'm riding strong. I think I made Matt Doyle curse at me once. I have no knee pain. I feel fine on stairs.  In hindsight, this may end up being the peak of riding season for 2015.

check out the ride here.

Monday, January 26:
I have pain up and down stairs. I figure whatever is going on it is a product of riding indoors, and I'm not going to that this week. I'm off the bike this day.

Tuesday, January 27:
I rode by myself very mellow at Middlerun. I wear a knee brace. It keeps my knee warm and it responds well to this. But it's tender the entire ride.

Thursday, January 28: 
I ride with Sharon, Brian and Thayer on snowy trains at Fairhill. No knee brace this time. Knee is tender from the time we leave the parking lot. Ride is fun, so I stick it out, but I feel it the entire time. I comment to Brian as we are leaving the park for the night, that I'm gonna be off the bike for a while.


Saturday, February 7:
I've been off the bike for 10 days. I'm feeling better, but still feel something on the stairs. We do an easy bike path ride, followed by a fun loop at Lums Pond. Diane tells me that I did too much first time out. I scoff at her...

Sunday, February 8:
Peoples ride, super short loop, as Diane and I pull off after Chesapeake City,I'm kinda cracked to be honest. The knee feels okay, but not great. Frankly, I'm tired from yesterday.  Improvement, but not where it should be. Diane pushes the pace a little, I give her grief for it. Flats don't cause as much issue as climbing...

Tuesday, February 10:
Kita and I do a townie ride. I'm chomping at the bit, but knee is bad on the hills. I probably overdue it.I feel tender, weak, but not specific pain up each one. Stairs are killing me. I'm resolved to not ride again until I can walk up down stairs with no issue. This is my last ride of 2015 thus far.

Wednesday, February 25- 
I go to see an orthopedic. I have been swimming 2x a week, got up to half a mile in around 22 minutes. It's not fun, but it's something. Started seeing an awesome massage therapist. Swimming seems to be making my knee feel worse frankly. Where initially I thought the pain was on the lower inside of the knee, I have experience pain pretty much everywhere. I am not an easy man to live with right now. (Sorry Diane). I stopped swimming the previous week and finally the knee pain gets centralized again. Dr. Andrisani diagnoses me with Pes Anserine Tendinitis. He comments if it was bursitis he's give me a shot and that would pretty much clear it up, but I'm not that lucky. Recovery will take time and patience. He gives me some stretches and says no bike for 4-6 weeks, then 3 weeks easy riding, and if no set back, 3 weeks endurance... Touch and go recovery...

Thursday, February 26-
Diane who has had a similar injury complicated by a bad reaction to a cortisone shot (resulting in a hole in her knee) has been very helpful through this process. She's shared what has worked for her, and what hasn't . She has had this diagnosis previously, and helps me through. I comb the internet reading every forum post, ever you tube video... I start stretching 30-40 minutes a day. Icing off and on 3-4x a day. I take a course of prescribed anti-inflamatories. Self Massage has also been helpful. I get something called a rumble roller, which I'm convinced is really a mid evil torture device.

Realizing that I have been substituting drinking beer for my riding, and very frankly drinking my feelings, I stop drinking on February 26. Just one morning too many waking up for work with a hangover. I know my family history, and while I don't believe I have an issue, I'm not tempting fate either...

Saturday, March 14
Making improvements. Continuing my course of stretching, icing, massage and self-massage. Been off of anti-inflammatories for almost a week. Knee is improving, but it's not there yet. If being inactive when the weather was awful was tough, when the weather is getting better it is even tougher.

I've been pretty good about keeping a 2000ish a day diet going. I try to eat smart. That said, I've gained 15 pounds. That's hard for me. I always fight my weight. When I'm riding a bike and burning 7000 calories or so a week, I can better control it. Being inactive- not so much.  Not doing anything has taken it's taken it's toll. That said, for now there's not much I can do. I can walk stairs normally. Pain is centralized and no longer constant- it had gotten there when I was swimming. I had to get to the darkest point to get better I guess... Swimming set me back I am convinced.

I want to take a moment to say that Diane has been a saint through out this. She's been here, and frankly still dealing with the hole in her knee. She's been supportive. I have pouted a lot. I looked forward to the 6 hour of Cranky Monkey and the battle royale shaping up there. I wanted to be in that fight. I have been mopey. I had to stop listening to Morrisey and the Smiths. I have not always had a positive outlook on this process. I get really moody.  I am horrible at sitting still.

I'm tempted by good weather and good progress to jump on the bike. But I also want to put this behind me. So I'm not rushing anything. I'm resolved that I won't be racing mountainbike this year, but I plan on a full cross season. I am going to Nationals in Asheville.  I have some rides I want to do in the late spring  and summer too. I do see progress, and I will continue to be patient.  My mental state is getting better, perhaps a product of progress, maybe daylight savings, maybe acceptance of my injury and timeline. Progress has given me hope.

I also want to say that I do have perspective on this... I'm not sick. No one is dying. I don't use the word blessed often, but I know that I am.  I have a wonderful wife. I have an amazing life. Great friends and family. I really do have a kick ass life. I just can't use my knee right now. If I never rode/raced a bike again- I would be bummed... But I can say, I'd be proud of what I did accomplish while racing, cherish the memories and times I had riding and I'd turn the page. I'd find something else... It's only masters bike racing after all... I hear croquet is the new aging hipster sport anyway... Maybe I'll take up baking.. hmmm...

anyway, thanks for allowing me to get all this out there, for me it really is part of the process for me...

good on ya!

thanks for reading.

respect
vanderbacon

Guest Blogger: Shane Pasley's Wild Wild West Part 2

Dear Readers:

Here's Part 2 from Guest Blogger Shane Pasley about his recent Western Exploration. Thanks for Sharing Shane:

here’s a strange thing about being in sparsely populated areas. The scenic routes are just as fast as the interstates. The bad thing about the scenic routes is they will do things like put you in the middle of the San Carlos Apache Indian Reservation at 3am. I had to poop. 

The Apache’s had set up a very nice rest area. Unfortunately maintenance was lacking and the only toilet in the mens room was rendered out of commission in more ways than one. Pulling from some recent advice from John Riggs at the bike fest, I headed over to the women’s facilities. Of course, as soon as I start my business someone walks in. At 3am. In a rest area. In the middle of an Indian reservation. I decided to speak up rather than to risk an encounter with mace and a spotlight on the evening news as the women’s bathroom bandit. “I don’t want you to freak out, but…” Luckily she thought it was hilarious. 

Everyone arrived in Phoenix as expected. We planned several big days of riding with flatter, B-paced recovery days in between. 

The first big ride was a section of the Arizona Trail, an 800 mile long trail that runs from the border with Mexico to the border with Utah. We’d be doing a 40 mile section near the Picket Post trailhead. Ben Anemone, Chris Jackson, Mark Prickett, and John Ricketts had rented another house and joined us. We also had Arizona locals Jeff and Nancy as trail guides. We dropped vehicles at the finish and shuttled up to the start. Prior research was showing this to be a challenging ride that would take most of the day. 

I’d call that epic

Arizona got a lot of rain this winter, so things were a lot greener than they have been the last couple times I’ve been out there. I made comments about areas of short, perfectly manicured grass coming up in areas that made it look like a golf course. Turns out it wasn’t grass but beds of tiny flowers that weren’t quite ready to bloom.

Ben, Nancy, Bob, and wildflowers

The start of the day seemed unusually easy, everyone was having fun and enjoying the great weather.

Chris and Joe all smiles at the mile 18 refuel.

Then, we hit a wall. The next 2 and a half hours it was nothing but up. It wasn’t until we got to the top that Dave realized we were doing the trail in the opposite direction from how our research had shown.

Training vacation

The scenery was well worthwhile, but everyone was wrecked for the last 10 miles. 

 Enhanced with hypoglycemic hallucinations

Despite the wide range of fitness levels, everyone finished the ride within about an hour of each other. 

The next big ride was a return to Black Canyon. Combining fast and flowy with lots of exposed bench cut trail, this was one of everyone's favorite rides last year. While the wet winter made everything green, it also washed a lot of loose gravel onto the trails. We were advised that the section of the Black Canyon Trail we rode last year wasn’t in the best shape and that trying a section a little further south would probably be more fun.

 Joe bringing the pain

It wasn’t as much fun as the section we rode last year, but it made up for it with some short technical sections.

The last big ride planned was a loop in Sedona. With the red slickrock and evergreens, Sedona is a stunning place to ride. There are trails available for all abilities, but the trails that make area famous are narrow, difficult, and wind their way to the top of the buttes. At the last minute Jeff and Nancy figured out they’d be able to join us and set up to lead another loop. 

The ride started innocently enough, was this another 8 hours of Picket Post?

They planned an awesome loop with trails that weren’t shown on our maps but also included favorites like the Hiline Trail.

Joe, Nancy, and Jeff with Hiline in the background

Another great day in the saddle. 

We got one more quick ride the day after the trip to Sedona, then it was time to return home. I owe a thank you to Jeff and Nancy for leading us around and giving us trail advice, Joe’s friend Mike for helping with transportation and restaurant recommendations, and the hospitality of everyone in the other rental house (which also included Scotty Roberts and Heather Heinrich, but we were unable to coordinate a big ride with them). 

There were several roadblocks that tried to derail this trip. I’m still having issues in my head, my driving co-pilot had a scheduling conflict, I caught a head cold from a coworker that blossomed the day I left, and the forecast for Lajitas was showing rain for the first 2 days. Despite all that could have gone wrong and did go wrong, it turned out to be an awesome trip. I couldn’t have asked for better weather or better people to spend it with.

 I think we killed Bob

I’ve already had a lot of questions about the trip next year. The sad news is that these trips use the majority of my vacation time, and I need time to do other things. Unfortunately I have no plans for a 2016 trip (although if you’re interested, it’s likely others will be going). 

Life happens, priorities change, and opportunities come and go. Only in college would I have gone to a concert and ended up spending the night in a Dennys. I got stranded after the buses stopped running at midnight. Similarly, it’s impossible to know when a resort might block the finish line of your favorite race course, someone is going to flood Glen Canyon, or The Trailspinners are going to pave another trail (love you Jim). The world as we know it today is ephemeral. Life is finite, there are only so many summers, so many hours of sunshine. The times when everything aligns and you’re able to enjoy life are precious; the time spent with others is invaluable. There is no guarantee abouttomorrow, the only guarantee is right now. Better make the most of it.

Wild, Wild West: Guest Blogger Shane Pasley Part 1

Mr. Cuter than James Franco himself asked me to add an entry to his blog. I don’t know if I should be honored, or if he's getting lazy and decided to follow the business model of The Huffington Post. I might just be the first step towards an ever decreasing quality of content that ends with clickbait created by child labor in a third world sweatshop. It does however give me full privileges to pinch Fatmarc’s cheeks whenever I want, although he didn’t specify which ones.

For the last several years I’ve been doing winter road trips to warmer parts of the country. It’s been a therapeutic escape from some unusually brutal winters. This year I managed to hit the 3-day Chihuahuan Desert Bike Fest in Texas before meeting Bob, Dave, and Joe in Phoenix for a week of riding there.

If you’ve never heard of The Chihuahuan Desert Bike Fest, that’s because it’s way down here. The closest big city is 5 hours away and the closest hospital is 3. Even people in Texas don't know there's topography down here.

The first day at the bike festival was a little disappointing. It had rained all night and temperatures were in the low 40s. I made it to the Lost Mine Trail for the 10am ride. When no one else showed up, I decided to ride anyway.

Delaware: 1, Texas: 0

It was pretty sweet to be out on the trail alone. I had plenty of time stop and take photos. The rain had really brought out some of the unique colors in the rocks, which was amplified by the gray skies and low-hanging clouds.

It’s not everyday you get to ride your bike inside a national park.

Alone in a wide open expanse

It was only a jeep trail, but it was technical enough to be fun.

I made it about 15 miles out before deciding it was time to head back. Shortly thereafter I ran into the official ride. They had delayed for an hour because it was still raining at 10. Most people were smart enough to pre-arrange someone to drive their car and rendezvous at the end of the 30 mile trail. The promoters had volunteers that would do this for you. Too bad I had turned my car into a storage locker to keep everyone's bikes safe.

Perfect.

Instead of a 30 mile downhill trail with a strong tailwind, I got to climb my way back against the wind. I guess it’s only fair, after all this was a training-oriented vacation.

​​

So damn windy

The second day I decided to check out the Lajitas trail system. Many of the “locals” (people from San Antonio, 450 miles away) talked about racing here back in the day, and how the trail system and the town of Lajitas itself were completely different back then. Some of the land under the trail system got sold around 2003 and the finish line for the Chihuahuan Desert Challenge got replaced with a soccer field and an expansion of the Lajitas Resort.

At least the mayor remained the same. Well, more or less.

The day started overcast, but by late morning it was sunny and temperatures were in the 70s. These trails were mostly flat but flowy.

They went all around and over this stuff.

A few of us went back for more after the official ride ended.

Probably wasn’t a good idea to follow the guy with drops.

The third day was the main reason I came down for the festival: the 60 mile epic ride to the other side of nowhere. When I was down this way 2 years ago I bought the t-shirt, now it was time to earn it. The state park ranger finished his instructions with the advice “make good decisions” to which someone quickly retorted “too late.”

Beautiful day for a leg ripping.

The rain from the first night had made the trails perfect. The washes filled with “soul sucking sand” were as firm as sidewalks. The A-pace group sold as a 7 hour ride only took 5.

Lajitas was having an unusually wet winter, which was also making the desert bloom.

The epic went great. The people were fantastic, and it’s an event I’m hoping to attend again.

Sunday it was time to leave, but there was one more thing I had to do before leaving. People kept talking about Singing Victor who operates a row boat and donkey service to visit the town of Boquillas in Mexico. This border crossing was recently reopened after being closed in 2001. I couldn’t find anyone interested in going, but after talking with several people including a group of rangers camping nearby it sounded safe enough. It was a free weekend for the national park so the border crossing was busy. I grabbed my passport and headed over.

I was only in town for lunch and a souvenir. On my way out I stopped in the store, which apparently wasn’t for tourists. The shelves were pretty sparse. The owner was friendly enough and started asking me questions “where are you from?” “did you enjoy lunch?” But the last question was “are you here alone?” to which I answered yes. The owner got quiet for a few seconds and gave me a weird look. It might’ve been obvious that I had just realized I was in a small room by myself in a foreign country where none of the other tourists could see me. He was probably trying to figure out why the strung-out, sunburned gringo was in Mexico alone. I quickly paid for my stuff and left.

Getting back into the US was easy enough. I have to say that the agents in charge of protecting the southern border are infinitely more friendly than the ones we use for Canada.

With that out of the way it was time to head to Phoenix; I’ve got some friends to meet.

coming soon part 2