Wednesday, December 29, 2010

damn you Gay UPS truck, how dare you come back into my life...

Monkey’s office is all pretty much working from home this week or on vacation.


One of our neighbors came by the house while she was there. While we consider ourselves good neighbors and wave and are friendly and helpful to everyone. That being said we do tend to keep to ourselves a bit. The neighbors often refer to us as the “crazy bike people” who have “like 30 people show up at 8 in the morning, and by noon there’s not a soul to be seen.” “it’s like a damn bike flash mob or something…”

The woman that lives to the right of us is named Bonnie, the woman to the left of us is named Paula.

Tuesday, Paula came to the house while I was talking to Diane on the phone.

The Dogs are going nuts in the background.
Fatme: “what’s going on ?”

Monk: “someone is here.”

Fatme: “who?”

Monk: “ I think it’s the lady next door…”

Fatme: “ Which one Bonnie or Paula?”

Monk: “to the left I can’t remember her name?”

The dogs are still going nuts

Fatme: “you mean Paula?”

Monk: “ do you know her name? I really can’t hear you that well”
             “RILEY !! LAYLA!!! SHUP UP!!”

Fatme: “her name is Paula.”

Monk: “shit I gotta go, I hope everything is alright, wish I remembered her name…”

Fatme: “love you babe, her name is Paula goodbye”

10 minutes later.

The dogs are totally silent.

Fatme: “ so, is everything cool with Paula? ”

Monk: “ Paula- huh, that’s her name. Yeah everything is cool, she was just letting us know
              That we lost some shingles off the roof…”

yeah, that's bummer.

My mountain bike is being serviced by the rebel alliance, having a new flux capacitor put on and a midichlorian detector added. I should totally be ready for some fun winter mtb rides.

As a result I had to pull out the old Gay UPS from the basement. The truth is I have been a recovered single speeder for three and a half years. I wouldn't call tonight a full on relapse, but I didn't want to love it, I didn't want the bike to feel as good and natural as it did...

I should have changed my stupid lock, I should have made you leave your key
If I had known for just one second, you'd be back to bother me


Fucking bastard. That bike is awesome.



Great ride tonight snow trails kept me on the edge of destruction all night. The boys were kind enough to not drop me. Dennisbike set a tempo was very smooth...  Steve, Erick, Aaron, Benny da Jewlar, and Johnny W rounded out a nice group. A great way to end a week...


happy new years folks.


stay safe. if you're drinking don't drive, and if you're driving, don't drink


respect
fatmarc

Sunday, December 26, 2010

A blog post about 15 movies with pictures that mean nothing to the story...

a couple of weeks back there was a thread on facebook talking about 15 movies that impacted you the most. I read them, and frankly was just too busy to sit down and hammer out my responses. So here's my stab at it.
Trav and Jake in the Spirit.
before we get started I need to explain that I look for 3 things in a movie:

1. something I can relate to
2. something that takes me away from life for a couple of hours
3. something that had lots of jackassery and stupid humor

to add this the rules said the first 15 that came to mind, so I kinda made my list and went back for commentary.
Dennisbike's butt

1. Star Wars (the first 3)- permeates everything
2. Breakfast Club- which one where you? I was clearly the princess
3. Some kind of Wonderful- first movie character that I felt like was my world
4. Forgetting Sarah Marshall- Mila Kunis went from cute to hot. Funny as hell too
5. Rachel's Wedding-movie captured what it's like to be in an alcoholic family. painful to watch.
Blake and Monk
6. Vision Quest- a movie about a high school wrestler? see rule 1
7. Bones Brigade Video Show- skate video that captured a life style I wanted, but didn't understand yet
8. Animal House- Jack Ass humor at it's best
9. Almost Famous- how can you not love a road trip movie
10. Big Fish- cry at the end every time; life is about your experiences and the stories you tell about them...
Monkey up they new climb along 273...
11. Caddy Shack- seriously the funniest move ever
12. Old School- more jack ass humor
13. 50 first dates- humor and a great date movie. I have a weakness for Drew Barrymore too
14. Roadhouse- this movie is a tractor beam, if it's on I'm watching it... Sam Elliot rules
15. Superbad- high school trying to get laid, and beer- perfect.
Jake and Allan the Cleaner
.

diane's bike out of the box...  I have lots of heavy parts in that box now.







respect
fatmarc

Monday, December 20, 2010

fear and loathing in heathrow

no idea who made this, but it's too good to not share...





respect
fatmarc

Sunday, December 19, 2010

back in the arms of peaches...

"I used to have a thing for girls in white bikini's. Seeing you in your white skin suit killed that for me man."
- Peaches


So I forgot my cell phone the other day... Rushing to get out the door, I grabbed my camera, and not my phone. You know I'm not the most brutally intelligent guy in the world to start with and I swear everyday I seem to get a little more - stupid.

But I digress, when I finally got home from work and my ride, I came home to find some text messages from my buddy Jeffy. Jeffy was trying to catch up with me to find out where our ride was, and see if he could tag along... I finally gave him a call but missed him,  I had just finished riding and he was out riding.. I did talk to his mother however:
 
Fatmarc: "yo, jeffy texted me a couple of times, i left my phone at home today, everything cool?"

Lweb:" yeah, he wanted to the Benny ride with you guys, but didn't know when it started..."

Fatmarc: "good thing I forgot my phone..."

Lweb: "what you don't want to ride with my boy?"

Fatmarc: "nope, I love to ride with your boy, but it's the night before he's scheduled to leave for Europe, and I have a bad habit of landing on top of your boy when I crash.  If that happened tonight, that would be awful, I can't have that on my conscience."

we both laughed...

Saturday rode with Michigan Matt, K-man, and Peaches at FH.











Sunday Monkey and I met up with 37 or so fellow riders over at white clay. With Diane and Breyla-la on the front, Auer and I got dropped. Awesome. We finally found the group, and I got dropped again... That's all part of riding in a group of 40 people or so huh? good times...It was great to see some good folks for sure... fun day....


respect
fm

Thursday, December 16, 2010

something about nothing


there's been a pile up on the 405...
I usually keep a bottle of water in the car this time of year. When I come out to the car, I'll find myself complaining about the cold, because I'm a cyclist and I like to complain, then I pick up the bottle and shake it.
Usually the bottle of water is still 100% fluid, and I say to myself:  "self,  what are you complaining for this bottle isn't even frozen, it's not that cold."  This morning when I came out, and started to complain about the cold, I shook the bottle, and  it was solid.

Benny Da Jewlar
Had a really fun mtb ride last night. My second time in as many weeks with this group. Different group of guys than  I usually ride with, but really fun. I'm enjoying my mtb in the off season...

The group has a different flow than the normal rides I do. Buddy and Peaches are two of my favorite people to mtb with... Our styles are so similar, we can ride so close to each other and fast, it's like a team time trial... It comes from years of riding together, and that's rad...
Steve
Riding with this group is a little different. All good guys, all amazing riders. But we all hit the park with a different take on loops, the flow of the group is still developing, we are figuring out what riding with each other is like... I think I still talk the most shit on the ride, but hell that's probably my role in the group...
Dennisbike- "that was 20 minutes more than I wanted 25 minutes ago"
Everyone loves John Williams

Anyway, it's been really fun...

respect
fm

Monday, December 13, 2010

new phone feature

dear readers,

So Friday morning, Diane and I were having an argument over the phone.

Suddenly I must said something over the line, because she hung up on me.

I called her back.

FM : " sweetie, I think we must have gotten disconnected..."

Monkey: "yup, I have our IT department looking at it, there's a new feature on my phone, it must have  kicked  in..."

FM : " what feature is that?"

Monkey : " the condescending ass hang up feature."

FM: "hows that work?"

Monkey: " When there's a condescending ass on the other line the phone disconnects."

FM: " point taken."

we both started laughing...

I think she is looking into the "jackass ejector seats" for the car as well.

respect
fatmarc

Monday, December 6, 2010

ars gratia artis

On cross…
Here’s the thing for me. I feel pretty torn.

For the longest time, cross was the sweet little thing. It was kinda counter culture, the racing was good, the scene was super cool. It was really grass rootsy. USAC didn’t pay much fuck attention to it, so it was bike racing for the people, by the people. In the different regions you had guys like Myserson, Stevenson, Bilodeau, Cline, Auer, Fries, Hebe, Sovek, Albright, McDaniel, Graham, Dugovich building the scene. We all went UCI because that was what we wanted to do to help grow the scene, and grow cross. UCI guaranteed some consistency in race courses, in rules, and on the whole Brought the level of cross up for everyone.

Yeah, we were UCI, but at the end of day, it was still very much grass roots. Regions working and learning from each other. It was people who love cross making it happen. Cross for the sake of cross if you will. It was coming up from the bottom, it was, fuck it, I’ll say it: kinda punk rock.

All of that appealed, and still appeals to me.

It reminded me of my skateboarding days, putting on demos, and weird contests in small parking lots… it was fun, it was cool to be building something and be a part of it.

Fast forward to today. Cross is a big deal. In 10 years of promoting Granogue Cross , we only hoped to break even, usually we lost money. (8 out of 10 years) We only made a small amount of money the past two years. Cross on the whole, makes money now. Money for bike companies, Money for USAC. It’s the golden child and is the fastest growing segment of the sport. Further, as a non  Olympic sport the output from USAC to the riders is very little. From where I sit, it feels like USAC is kind coming to the table now saying : “ thanks for grooming this for us, and we’ll take over from here now that there’s money to be made.”

Did you ever see Corvette Summer? It’s like that: Luke Skywalker builds up an old junker corvette, it gets stolen and then Luke Skywalker has to try and get it back. (never mind the hooker girlfriend)

That’s what it feels like right now. I want my fucking corvette back.

UCI… I feel like that was the deal we made with the devil. Sooner or later we’d have to pay our due. And now, now that we are no longer just those silly guys in America, they are coming for their due… They are holding us to all the standards, monetary and otherwise. I think we all kinda knew that would happen, even if we didn’t want to admit it.

USGP… they are benefitting from all the work of everyone in the regions, and putting on a good show. Problem is they are stepping on the throats of the people who built the foundation that cross rests on. It’s gone from being cooperation between series, to USGP saying “we’re driving the bus now… “ They also seem to get treated differently by USAC than the rest of the UCI promoters. It doesn’t leave a good taste in anyone’s mouth…

USAC… from where I stand, I would expect them to advocate for the UCI promoters in this country, to seek out clarification on rule enforcement, and in short to help foster the growth of the sport here, and support the promoters/regions/races that have worked so hard to get cross where it is today. From my perspective USAC fails on all fronts here. Should I be surprised?

All of that makes me want to say FUCK YOU to UCI and USAC. We had almost 1300 riders at the Granogue Weekend. Charm City was the same. Very frankly less than 10% of the riders were elite racers. What would Granogue look like if we went totally pirate? Our Mountain Bike race is pirate, and we get 600+ riders each year. It could happen. Cross for the People. That’s really always been the goal of Granogue, and I hope we never lose sight of that…

The other side of me is this. I have two friends going to Christmas Cross. I have a number of friends who have gone to worlds, and there are a number of folks that are on the cusp of taking that next step from the Mid Atlantic to National Prominence. If there are no races in the mid atlantic that offer USAC or UCI points, are we doing our region a disservice? Are we cutting our nose off despite our face, and denying the very people we sought to support by going UCI in the first place? Yeah, I think we are.

I want to see LVG go to worlds. I’m stoked that Jeffy and Gunnar will race in Europe this winter. I want to see Sam, Gunnar and Jeffy all go to worlds.

I want to see Bad Andy and Wes and the fucking Swiss Cheese get to race the best in the country here in the Mid Atlantic. I want to see those guys get recognized for the great work that they do.

I’ve been on the UCI national promoters list for a very short time. I am more of an observer than anything else. Perhaps I have been naïve, perhaps I was looking at the cross world through rose colored glasses. At the end of the day, what I read, what I saw just made me sad. This cross game is a business now.

It’s big money in someone’s pocket. Now that we’ve grown it, USAC wants their cut.

And so, I’m a little torn, and a lot sad.

That’s all I have to say about that…

respect
fatmarc

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Monkey and Fatmarc Ride...

Thanks to everyone that came out for the Monkey and Fatmarc Ride today...
It was a wonderful tour of Fairhill. So much fun, and got to ride two sweet new trails. (score).


On the ride there was a lot of chatter about how people could win a dinner of 1/2 priced nachos and fish tacos with Fatmarc and Monkey. You go here and buy a raffle ticket and hope for the best. It could be your lucky day..

You could also win some other cool stuff, and frankly help send some good kids to Christmas Cross.













thanks for reading.

respect.
fatmarc

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

WIN FISH TACOS AND 1/2 PRICED NACHOES WITH ME AND MONKEY!

or other assorted cool stuff which can be found here.

Help these good and cool kids race at Christmas Cross....

Jeffy- my teammate for the Granogue TT.


Gunnar. My teammate and amazing kid.
 Aw hell, who are you kidding helping the kids? Help yourself,

we are talking fish tacos and 1/2 priced Nachos with ME and Monkey!

(and other cool stuff)

seriously, help the kids man, help the kids...

more info here if you are so inclined.

respect
fatmarc