159: See you in an hour or so...

A little less than a year ago Wes the Conqueror and I did a team time trial. The name of our team was Beauty and the Beast.

care to guess which I was?

Although we went into it with playfulness in mind, and we had a ton of fun, I realized that I really like the time trial game. With my spring season now a little more freed up, I really wanted to get some more TTing on my plate.

during last cross season, I talked with my teammate Disco about it. Disco is a pretty renowned time trialist, counting in his palmares a PA TT State Championship. I said that I'd like to take a shot at sub hour 40k. Disco advised me how hard that was, but also gave me his vote of encouragement, saying, " I know you could do it..."

Sub hour 40k, that means basically maintaining an average speed of 25mph for an hour. I have never approached anything of that nature, and in the shorter TT's I have done this year, the my best average speed was 23 mph. I have had my doubts.

It is with that background that I went to Church Creek with good form, and although my focus was the 24hrs of Big Bear last weekend, I felt that my fitness, my super sweet front wheel, and of course my team issue booties would give a good shot at meeting my goal.

As this week unfolded, I'll admit I was getting more and more nervous, and starting to stress what had started as really an ignorant comment, not realizing how daunting a sub hour 40 k would be. It was time to put up or shut up.

Standing in line at the port-o-lets with Auer, he comments, "you should do sub hour no sweat..." I responded, "I am sweating it, I have been all week, I want to have a good ride." He bolstered my confidence, "I mean if you didn't break an hour it wouldn't be that big of a deal..." I snarkly responded, "thanks Kris, no pressure or anything..."

Next thing I know I'm at the line. They ask If I want a hold, and I respond yes, as a large man comes over and hold me up.

I joke, "put your hands on my big boy..."

the official says, "20 seconds"

I ask her, "having a good day? weather looks good, should be nice for a little ride.."

she responds, "10 seconds..."

I keep going, "not a lot of conversation at the start house today I guess, guess I'll go out for a little ride, maybe an hour or so"

She responds, '5, 4, 3, 2, 1, go!"

I give her credit she never broke character, I really tried to get her to smile. No such luck.

10K

I have caught my :30 man, my minute man, and am quickly closing in on my 1:30 man. I'm feeling good. I remember the words Mayhew said to me, "don't go out too " hard. Did I just go out too hard? I feel good, I press on...

15K

I get stoked for a second thinking I only have 10k to go, then snap back to reality realizing and saying to myself, "hey jackass, 25 miles is 40k, not 25k" The headwind is nasty, I'm really working, pushing a big gear.
20k

My junk is sound a sleep. Like laying your head on a pillow with your arm under it. All of it out cold. I always promised myself if my junk fell asleep I'd stop. Clearly I can't keep my word to myself. I'm rolling pretty good, 20k came up faster than I thought it would. I'm a really concerned about my twig and berries however. As a crosser/mountain biker, my style is really to change my position often, to stand up a lot throw the bike around. These things are the kiss of death in time trialing. So despite my boys being out cold, I stay in position. This is bad for my junk. I just hope it comes back to life in another 20k or so.

25K

I catch my friend Jim. Jim has been on the horizon for me for a while, and in a twisty section I finally catch him. As I pass I startle him a bit as I whisper, "I love you Jim!" When Jim realizes it's me he cheers, "dig deep Marc! Dig Deep!" That helps. What lack of feeling I have in my boys, is more than made up for by the pain in my legs.

30K

Got a bit of a tailwind, I'm pushing my biggest gear. Auer said at 10k, give it everything you have left and I am. My hands hurt from holding the TT bars on my road bike. I open then up for a second, then curse myself, "you're giving time away..." I bite my lip, and drive on. Is this damn thing over yet? please!!" I have a little vurp. Red bull doesn't taste good the second time around. I tell myself to hang on, puke after I finish if I have to...

35K

I'm pushing my biggest gear, legs are hurting, breathing has finally slowed down, I push harder knowing the end has to be around the corner, hoping it's the next corner, tail wind in the end is a kind blessing...

40K

I see the line 200 meters out of the last corner. I spin my gear as fast as I can, I cross the line with a sense of relief that it over. I have no idea if I made my goal, but I left it all out there. It's over. I stand up and break position for the first time in hopefully less than an hour. I think to myself, that was so much fun. Then I realize the pain coming from my crotch. It feels like someone smacked me with a 2x4. I envision the gym teacher from Beavis and Butthead "kick me in the jimmies!!"

My inner thighs are cramping bad, they never hurt during the ride, but right now I want to cry. My sit bones, which were clearly mispositioned on my road bike are screaming. I feel needles and pins in my frank and beans. I actually worry that I might get a boner as the blood comes rushing back into these parts of my body. I just imagine all the people thinking how much of a dork I'll be riding around in my skin suit with a wood.

Jim finishes up, and we cool down riding the 5 miles from the finish line back to our cars. I have to stand the entire ride back, because my crotch will not allow me to sit down.

I figure, it's over now, just sit back and lets see the results. Sadly, despite the sweet chip timing, the results were kind of a cluster fuck. I spent the last 36 hours stressing it a bit waiting to see my time. What if I was 1:01? that would be better then 1:00:01. I talk myself down, telling myself I did my best, it will be whatever it is.

Finally, my phone started blowing up, and E-town sent me the numbers 59:14.

59:14!! So sweet. Auer called and congratulated me, I left Mayhew a message "40k- 59:14 thanks coach." Karl Connley, who gave Sven and I fits at the Rockwood cross race last year won my class and San Sebastien from NCVC was second.

Did I mention 59:14 !?

Sunday I didn't ride because my ass hurt too much. Instead I went down to St Andrew's school to cheer on the potty mouth princess in her first tri. I mean all the support she lends me the least I can do is go out and cheer her on. It was great fun.

She killed it winning her age group. I was super proud of her. Maybe I should retire, and just go to tris to cheer for her!?

The tri scene was cool, totally different from what I am used to, very nice actually. PMP was awesome. Auer had a solid day too, finishing 2nd in his age group. Blair had a good today too , as did DCCoDer Joe Manning.

All in all a pretty awesome weekend from my perspective. Thanks to Heidi for the killer cookies Saturday, thanks to Monkey for waiting for me at the TT, she tells me that this event was the most boring she has ever watched.

Sanford and E-town, studs in their own right, cheer on their wives/future wives....

thanks for reading. (59:14!!!)

respect

faticus