Superbowl of Facial Hair...

I wanted to thank all of you who noticed my fledgling beard yesterday. The warm greetings of " pack your razor too soon" or "are you living in the Honda this week? " were appreciated, but allow me to give you some insight to my rough looking face this week. Okay, generally I am recognized for my favorite piece of facial hair my sideburns. As I have shared with you all, I have even named my wonderful sideburns (lefty and Kevin). As we quickly approach Thanksgiving, an unspoken family tradition builds it's way up for the Fatmarc Family. That's right the Superbowl of Facial Hair. All my brothers and my father , we all participate.

Thanksgiving morning as the family gathers, we all eye up what the other has going and quietly give a nod a approval but a weak effort can result in being shunned. You know like the Amish or something. Let me give you a run down on what I'm up against this week:

Dad- he goes with the Grizzly Adams look. Full on beard, extra woolly for the holiday. Could be borderline Uncle Jesse, but still probably 6 months from ZZ top. Always a strong competitor
Brother Bryan- Bryan is a probation officer, so he usually stays pretty clean cut, however this week you can expect a really patchy 5 o'clock shadow looking move. He'll follow up with some good thanksgiving pants (elastic waistband) and he'll be a dark horse to win.
Brother Tim- Perhaps the favorite in this year's competition. Tim can rock a full on Amish Beard. However, I think he’s going more conservative this year, should be exciting to see what he brings. The 2-1 favorite to win. Brother Craig- the wild card. Craig lives in New England so we are never really sure what he's going to bring. A couple years ago he was our surprise winner with a totally horrible patchy, beard. He was going for the Civil War look but it just wasn't happening for him. I suggested he take some hormones. That didn't go over so well. He won using a prop- a cowboy hat. The combination of a patchy Civil War beard an awful cowboy hat was more than any of us could hang with.
Me- Well, I've had the full on Elvis chops, gone with the soul patch, and from time to time have rolled out the goatee. Frankly, my trustee sideburns, lefty and Kevin never let me down. But this year I really need to step up my game. First I thought about going with the cop mustache. I figured I could win easily with that, totally unexpected and shock value always pays off, then I saw Lemmy from Motorhead and was inspired. Side burn to Side burn via the mustache. Yeah that's the ticket. Diane quickly put the kibosh on that. So it’ll just me, lefty and Kevin, my trustee side burns.

So you see the competition is tight, and now you all know that I am in fact training for the facial hair superbowl. Your support is greatly appreciated.

respect
fm