169: i wish i would have met you...

Irony?

Driving through the Cecil County Fair today.

One of their theme's this year for the Rodeo is "tough enough to wear pink"

A fund raiser for breast cancer/cancer awareness.

I watched as a couple of 20 year olds or so crossed in front of my car with their "tough enough to wear pink cancer research organization" t-shirts on, whilst smoking a couple of Marlboros.

Irony or Stupidity?

Henry posted this sweet video. Does it get any better than this ? Buddy and Les rule.
My new cross frames :

sweet frame, super light, great geometry, made for cross. unbelievable. Yes Meg, they would still be pigs on the road, and be a knife at a gun fight in the woods.

Wait, those aren't my new frames, that's a water filtration system.

sometimes being grown up sucks...

Half dozen videos from cyclocrossvideos.com $42

DVD Player to play them $28

Watching a Sunday in Delaware and seeing so many familiar faces: priceless

I find myself in the garage wrenching on my cross bikes. I glimpse over at this:

Man I love that bike. It's just brings joy to me. I have said it before here, but really my love of mountain bike racing is a thing of the past. This bike isn't tied to my identity, it doesn't make me "fatmarc the douche bag brand whore." It just makes me another guy wearing black, riding a black bike. Sometimes it's nice to hide in the crowd, and not be the local jackass.

Maybe I'm just another of Auer's Damned Goons (that's what ADG stands for right?) We are the scourge of Mabra Cross, at least in some's opinion. But I digress, my bike is pretty basic, but all decisively set up to my specifications. It makes me happy. It was the instrument that allowed me to exorcise many a demon this spring. I make no bones that my love affair with mountain bike racing has waned, but my love of this bike, and applying it to do the job it was designed to do: ride trails quickly, and fluidly- is an extreme pleasure.

We had some out of town friends stop over and Monkey and I took them for a little tour of Fairhill. It was a lot of fun. I was picking Mark's brain like crazy. Finally, I said to him" if you get tired of me doing that, just tell me to shut up." He smiled," nah, I love to talk about this stuff."

Not only is he dashing, but also a gentleman.

So pro, always tinkering with their position... (that was for you Jan ;-) )

Grass Track starts soon. My cross bikes are delightful. Really. Now to try and bring my fitness around. I guess I better lay off the high life and nachos huh?

Cross season is bikini season for dudes. I mean, a skin suit is a skin suit. I better stop eating this stuff:

Jebbagger is such a rock star. Except his not at all. Great kid.

Remind me to give him a wedgie next time I see him.

tonight is game night.

Gonna get my Yahtzee on...

respect

faticus

168: tagged

Okay, I hate chain emails as much as the next guy, " pass this email on and you have good luck, stop the chain and you'll get a flat in the next race you do", but I was also the guy who for a year and a half sent out 10 random questions to a list of about 50 people every Friday. That was fun for a while, I admit I sometimes toy with the idea of starting that up again, but alas I have been tagged.

But I digress, Jim is a great guy and he tagged me, so I'm on like donkey kong:

If you could have any one — and only one — bike in the world, what would it be?
I'll be honest it would be my niner emd moutainbike. Here's my reasoning. If I wanted to race cross, I could put cross tires on it and do it, if I want to do some road riding, I could put road tires on it and make that work, If I wanted be single speed, I could make that happen too. I admit it wouldn't be the best tool for cross, or road, but it could be an all around bike.

Reading this blog you might think I'd say " my cross bikes", not the case.

If anyone ever tells you that a cross bike is the best all around bike, tell them if you had a glove you'd smack them. Then proceed to borrow some gloves from Wes, and smack them with the glove.

A cross bike is a pig on the road, and doesn't have the brakes, or the geometry for single track. If someone tells you that riding single track on a cross bike is fun, throw your drink on them and tell them they are liars. Dirty, rotten, fucking liars. Cross bikes are good for one thing, cross. They suck for anything else. That's why they are so cool, they are built for one thing- cross. My Forts don't even have holes for water bottles. Because you don't need them in cross. So fucking punk.

Do you already have that coveted dream bike? If so, is it everything you hoped it would be? If not, are you working toward getting it? If you’re not working toward getting it, why not?

I don't get bike lust that badly, my bikes are all pretty pedestrian by most standards, but they fit my needs. I really like my bikes a lot, but I doubt anyone would call them dream bikes. I don't think I really have dream bikes. I break light stuff, I'm kind of a big guy. A TT bike is on the mind, and sweet road bike like a colanago or something would be cool, but kinda under utilized by a fellow like me. So I ride my basic stuff, and I'm happy about it.

If you had to choose one — and only one — bike route to do every day for the rest of your life, what would it be, and why?

probably some loop in fairhill, but that's really kinda of a stupid question. If I could only ride one route, I'd probably start skateboarding or take up lawn darts or something. The variety of riding is one of the things I love.

What kind of sick person would force another person to ride one and only one bike ride to do for the rest of her / his life?

Maybe the Joker or some one sick like that. Seriously those questions change the entire game for me.

Do you ride both road and mountain bikes? If both, which do you prefer and why? If only one or the other, why are you so narrow minded?

I ride both. Very early on in my start to this sport Andrew impressed upon me the importance of being a well rounded cyclist, not a roadie, not a mountain biker. I kinda pride myself in being able to show up to any ride in our area road or mountain and hang. Racing wise, I'll do some events on the mountain bike, road racing scares me too much. Way too many angry DC lawyers that want to put my punk ass in the ground. I also find folks that ride the road only are poor bike handlers. I've made a cross career out of beating guys stronger than me, who can't turn in the grass. Sorry but it's true.

Have you ever ridden a recumbent? If so, why? If not, describe the circumstances under which you would ride a recumbent.

my contract with twinsix forbids me from practicing black magic and riding recumbent bikes. I think it's just another level of geekiness in this sport. If was so injured that the only way I could continue was to ride a recumbent, I might look at it. I might also take up shuffleboard.

Have you ever raced a triathlon? If so, have you also ever tried strangling yourself with dental floss?

I swim like a brick. I run only when chased by someone holding a weapon. I don't know what dental floss is. I haven't brushed my teeth since I was six. I wear the same underpants I did when I was fourteen, only now they have more stretch marks. They are damn sexy.

Suppose you were forced to either give up ice cream or bicycles for the rest of your life. Which would you give up, and why?

icecream- I could still do water ice, and I think I'm liking that better recently.

What is a question you think this questionnaire should have asked, but has not?
Also, answer it.

Can you conceive cycling without racing?

no, racing keeps me pushing myself to be better each year and to learn. Without that impetus I might take up chia pet herding or start a sea monkey colony.

You’re riding your bike in the wilderness (if you’re a roadie, you’re on a road, but otherwise the surroundings are quite wilderness-like) and you see a bear. The bear sees you. What do you do?

I wrestle the bear to the ground and I bite his ear. He tells me his name is Teddy Ruxpin and he wants to be my friend. I kick him in the ass, show him my headlock and continue on my way.

Now to keep the chain rolling I think I have to "tag" people:

I'm going with the Queen of the Beaners, Ms. DeVious, Rock, Wes T. Conquorer, Rich B , Beth, Rotten and Buddy.

respect
faticus
"keeper of chain emails"

167: Magic Gloves...

Driving to work on Friday I saw a sign that said this:


"Go Green- Use our new Organic Hair Line!"

all I could think of was this:



Looks like the kids had a nice run at National. Highlighted by this:

Super sweet hat Ryan. Is that Art School Standard Issue now a days? I'll miss you during cross but wish you the best.

Old Breyla-la fought her way to a podium finish as well. Good to her! I'll get a picture as soon as I can.

Just got word that Wes won short track today too. I wasn't going to say anything, but he was wearing my gloves when the xc national championship, and you know my gloves when he won short track. Yeah, there pretty special gloves. I'm not saying if you wear my gloves you can win a national championship, I'm just saying.

Here's a picture of my gloves winning the short track national championship:

since my gloves were busy winning national championships, and I've been on a break for a while I figured I should get out with the boys.

The boys who prompty kicked me in the ass. The group was a fine group of DCCoDers: (Papa Smurf, CZ, Iron Mike, Dan DDUB, Jan, Jay-Z,Rich B, E-town as well as Wolfie and Postal Dave).

The loop had lots of hills and I got dropped a lot. It was really hot. E-town didn't want me to show this picture:

I don't know why, it's actually a pretty nice picture.
I saw a lot of this as I was dropped on everyhill today:

And then this one:

Luckily Papa Smurf was there to pace me back to the group:

Behind this smile are the tears of a hurting sad clown.

Oh wait, there go my gloves winning another national championship....

Congrats to KC on having a pretty nice day today as well. I can't say she ever used my gloves. Maybe I'll lend her a pair for worlds next year.

respect

Faticus

166: MC5

I vividly remember when I was a kid and still skating. Whenever we'd find a new spot, perhaps a nice set of curbs, or maybe a new industrial park with a sweet bank, we'd hoard it amongst our little group. That new secret spot, was our secret, because we knew that if everyone heard about it, it's likely get busted or closed. Same thing went for finding a new mini ramp. If the kid's parent's realized how much traffic would be jumping their fence to trespass and ride their ramp, no way would they have let little Johnny Ripper build that ramp. Secret Squirrel type stuff...

I have to admit riding was like that for a bit. I remember when Elk Neck first opened up, hell even Middlerun in 1991, was like the magical secret spot. So Rad. It was exactly this same spirit that Buddy found a secret bouldering spot, really freaking local to us. Friday night after work we went and did a little exploring and freaking hit a gold mine. A few hours later as darkness ascended on our little group (Buddy, Rachael, Christian, Monkey and I), we walked out of the woods exhausted and exhilarated. I only freaked out once, but I look forward to getting another shot at actually finishing the problem and not having Rachael pulling me over the top out....

One thing I don't understand... I mean peace loving damn dirty hippies are supposed to love the environment right? I mean earth day everyday right? So why the fuck would you hike into the woods and on beautiful boulders, spray paint peace signs? I mean, perhaps they need to go back to dirty hippy school, but graffiti in nature kinda misses the whole point of being a damn dirty hippy right?

BTW been listening to a bunch of MC5 today. I think they might me be new favorite band. Especially the live stuff. So freaking good.

Fairhill Classic was today. Buddy the Keg Breaker, Rotten Rob, Potty Mount Princess, Eric E and I worked the expert/sport pool stop marshalling station today.

We DID NOT HAVE A BEER STOP. And this is clearly is not beer:

we make this look good:

Rotten and Buddy T. Kegbreaker test the water:

Perfect, and Pete agrees:
Kuhn Dog and Auer were battling on the trail, and splash fighting in the pool.

Big Bush cannonballed in:

Travis, rocking his first expert race, cools off and just wanted to know who the dude in the loin cloth holding his bike was:

Always wash your Peaches!!

Jimmy Z gets refreshed!!

International Man of Mystery, Les Leech double dipped, splashing down on the way in and the way out of South Park. Stay thirsty my friends, stay thirsty.

Nothing like a nice swim on a hot day!

Fergie gets into the act!

The Queen of Rock herself splashed down. I might note she was the only sport rider to splash down, I'm not saying sport riders take themselves too seriously, I'm just saying...

All Hail the Queen of FUCKING Rock! Yeah Anne Rock!!

Rotten and I reload...

People kept trying to grap our saftey devices:
way more of Rotten than you wanted to see.
respect.

faticus

165: i'm at the mall on a diet pill

Been trying to get to work late all week. Today I succeeded.

Going into my subpar time trial last week, I knew I had a break coming up. Perhaps on some level that played into my subconscious and contributed to my suckyness. Perhaps, I am just getting fatter and slower. At least I had the most doubles for the second half of the season in our division.

Regardless, I am currently on day 5 of a 10 day break. Bikes are all stored in the basement. I am one of those guys that Kerry Litka frowned upon for throwing away perfectly good weather to ride and race in, saving themselves for cross, when the weather is cold and bad. Now she writes for all the cross magazines. Bigger flip flop than John McCain. Good to her, pay the bills. She’s a nice lady. I’m a such a douche (Jan, the smartest man in town told me so).

"faticus, you're a douche bag."

Wheels are being re-glued, I am having Slick Rick build me a second set of tubies… New Chain Rings too… Time to find out if my efforts to gain power have been successful. It’s July but damn, I’m starting to lust over Den's, Mike's, Kevin's, and Anthony’s cross pictures. Then there’s this. Facebook for crossers.

Yes, I am geeking out.

So what am I doing with my ten day break you ask? Eating- A lot. I expect to break 180lbs by Friday. I’ve also been watching some movies, No Country for Old Men is no joke. Anton Sugar is one of the 5 best villains of all time. (Darth Vader, Hannibal Lector, Delores Umbridge, and Lance Armstrong are my other four).

Also been doing a bit of reading, a bit of resting, and taking subtle jabs at people in my blog. (perhaps you have noticed)

Buddy and I are going to be course marshalls for a section of the Fairhill Race this weekend. Notice I said we were going to Marshall, NOT HAVE A BEER STOP. From day one, Buddy and I have NEVER said we were going to have a BEER STOP. Apparently everyone from the current president of the trail spinners (wink, wink, nod, nod) to anyone who passes Todd on the trail is under the assumption that Buddy and I are having a beer stop.

This prompted a 7:30am phone call from Todd to insure that Buddy and I HAVE NO BEER.I heart Todd. But seriously, We never told anyone we were having a BEER STOP. There will be NO BEER STOP. And the truth is I’m kinda bummed, NOT BECAUSE THERE WILL BE NO BEER STOP, but at the insinuation, that if Buddy and I are volunteering, then we must be doing a BEER STOP.

As a promoter, I understand where Todd is coming from, I don’t like beer stops, I don’t want one at our races either. I was the one that made the decision to have a dry Granogue Race this year. I get all that. But damn, am I being punished for past sins or something? Try to volunteer and help out, and get the principal call in the morning. Maybe I’m watching too many High School movies. Too much drama.

I guess I’ll have to go stuff my face some more to make myself feel better.

Pass the cheesecake bitch.

respect

faticus

for those scoring at home subtle jabs went to:

Kerry Kitka

Jan Von Doom

John McCain

Lance Armstrong

Beer Stops (wink, wink, nod, nod)

Trail Spinners

Fairhill Rangers

164: go west fitzy...

Friday night much of the DCCoD community gathered to raise a toast to our buddy Mark Fitzwater, who like Dangerous Dan, Mike and Jeanie, and Katie before him, has heard the calling west, and could not resist. I have been on teams with Fitzy as long as I have been on teams. First on Wooden Wheels and then riding for Michael and Jessica. As a team director he set the standard, supporting our community through countless 24hr teams, and building an incredible record that earned him the nickname "Johan". As a rider, Fitzy was one of the smoothest guys I got to ride with, and put together a hell of a endurance resume of his own over the past few years. Fitzy has pretty much built the "Weymouth's section" of Granogue into what it is today. He has always busted his ass to make sure the Granogue races came off the best, and made sure folks always enjoyed his section. A great story teller, always ready to share a slice of his world with you, Fitzy has been beloved in our community. Colorado better treat him right.

Friday morning saw Monkey and I on the road early. The past two weekends Buddy, Rachael, Diane and I have headed out on climbing adventures that involved getting lost and wandering around the woods. Today Monkey and I got lost on route 611 north.

At 7:45, I had kinda resolved that I was going to miss my start, but still had a shot to get Monkey to hers. We called Ethan woke him up, and had him map quested us directions. (thanks man)

I got there, picked up my packet and squeezed in a 15 minute warm up on the trainer, while firing back a redbull, before heading to the start. Not my ideal warm up, but what the hell.

From looking at past running of events here, I knew I had to pull a time around 22 and some change to get a good result. My time of 23:18 however did not deliver such a pretty result. It's okay, I had fun, and really I gave it everything I had. I took off, put it in my biggest gear and turned it as fast as I could. 25.7 mile per hour average for the race. I knew my result was going to be ugly when local honch Spencer, who started :30 seconds behind me, caught me with 2 miles to go. I'm strong right now, but I don't have any form, I had fun today. I can be better.

I was also super proud of Monkey in her first time trial. She was worried about being able to break 30 minutes for the 10 miles. She didn't think anyway, anyhow she could average over 20 mile per hour. Despite borrowing E-town's helmet that she couldn't keep out of her face, she finished in 28:38 or so. She was very pleased. I was very proud of her.

The on the drive home, yeah, we got lost again. We counted 7 starbucks while we were lost. It was beautiful.

Pictures by Anthony Skorochod. Super good dude, I think I'm gonna get a t-shirt made out of this one. The helmet makes it a classic.

good luck Fitzy.

respect

faticus